An open letter to all those feeling personally victimized by resistance to the gender binary.

635882589293180031-1196482094_Girls Victimized

Dear mothers, fathers, uncles, aunts, and any other gendered familial names I’ve missed-

There’s been a lot of talk around a particular topic and so I’ve decided to bring forth some reasoning and explanation about why this is such a controversial topic. I recently saw a POST on my wall condemning the ever-popular “Gender-Reveal” party, and I must say, I mostly agree with everything the author stated in the article, but, being an actual real-life trans person, I feel like I have an additional perspective to contribute to the dialogue.

Being trans, it is not only the validity of my identity that I am fighting for, but theScreen Shot 2017-07-10 at 16.27.07 acceptance of all trans individuals statewide, nationwide, and yes, even worldwide. So, it should go without saying that I, as a member of the gender-variant community of this world, reject the gender binary.

Holding a celebration for having a child is cute. You typically have a party…ONE party…there’s a name for them that is currently eludi- AH YES, the good ‘ole BABY SHOWER. Honestly, people complain about having to attend those enough so WHY DO YOU NEED AN EXCUSE FOR ANOTHER UNNECESSARY PARTY?

“But Britney, like, I just want to have another party because parties are fun and I want to hang out.”

“OMG Whitney, I know I can’t wait to buy the right color clothes and everything once we find out!”

And right there lies the problem. The gender-reveal party is not just a grand old time 4896822030_e7fa872658_bcelebrating and drinking a beer with the boys; it is LITERALLY a CELEBRATION of the baby’s GENDER (which, I may add, does not even START to develop until around 2). By celebrating the one thing that people like me are trying to overcome, it’s reinforcing the fact that there actually IS a gender binary, and not only that, but gender stereotypes to go along with that. The sea of blue or pink that rains down when party throwers shout, “It’s a [insert boy or girl here]!” is actively invalidating our fight to break down these persistent little stereotypes of BLUE IS BOY and PINK IS GIRL.

So, NO, I will not pretend to support your regressive gender-reveal party…I will, however, celebrate the birth of your child because babies are cute and make for awesome snapchat stories.

Mit Fruendschaft,
Mel Mason


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